Not long ago, United States Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood convened an audience in Watertown, Wis., with the intention of touting the “high speed” rail station he imagined would be built there. Along with Jim Doyle, the Secretary signed a grant agreement to use $46.5 million of American Recovery and Reinvestment Acts funds to begin the infrastructure for a new train through Midwest. The problem is, Wisconsin can’t afford a train.

When he was confronted with that fact, LaHood snapped that Wisconsin was not the one affording it. “This is a national program,” LaHood said. “This administration is committed to high-speed intercity rail. From the time President Eisenhower signed the interstate bill, there were a lot of changes in administration - politicians came and went, but the national program continued over a 50-year period and today, in America, we have the interstate system. So, we know elections will take place and we know that some people will get elected and others won’t, but this is a national program. We are committed to it and high-speed intercity rail is coming to America. High-speed rail is coming to Wisconsin.”

What LaHood forgets to mention is that this national program will be run with Wisconsin taxpayer dollars, and in a state that faces a $2.7 billion budget deficit with an additional commitment to repay $200 million plus interest to the illegally-raided Patients’ Compensation Fund, plus the promise to repay the legal fees of the groups that sued over the Government Accountability Board’s recent assault on free speech, we’re a little short of “walking around” money. We’re even shorter on “buying the finest in 1930’s era transportation” money. Despite the fact that LaHood and Doyle seem determined to sink every dime allotted to this project into its realization immediately, I beg to differ with those guys. I don’t believe “high-speed” rail is coming to Wisconsin.

Doyle may pay for holes to be dug, tracks to be laid and cars to be made, but Wisconsin can’t afford the $7.5-$8 million in yearly subsidies that the train would cost to run. And unless Doyle or LaHood is offering to personally open his checkbook to foot the bill, Wisconsin taxpayers, who’ve seen enough spending on pork projects, are unwilling.

Taxpayers want nothing to do with this because the subsidies would continue in perpetuity…no one even thinks it may be profitable. In fact, only one “high-speed” train line in the world turns a profit—the Tokyo/Osaka line in Japan. Even in France, where this type of rail is more commonplace, people drive 20 times more than they take trains. And at $330 a week per commuter in the middle of the deepest recession in generations, you can’t tell me that a ride on a 58 mph train will entice a lot of folks.

Let’s call this what it is: a crazy train. And let’s assure Ray LaHood that, despite this national “gift” of a train, we want the gift receipt. It’s too expensive …really…they shouldn’t have!